Wednesday, October 8, 2014

Blogging Survivor: San Juan del Sur - "It's Reed that is on our team"



The second episode of Survivor: San Juan del Sur began with Josh trying to explain his decision to vote against Baylor in the initial episode, which he explained by saying that he didn't want the guys to know he was actually working with her.

At the same time, while Josh didn't vote with the rest of the guys like he was supposed to, his failure to commit to a side ended up screwing the women over because it helped the men to send Nadiya home.

At the Reward Challenge Natalie saw that her sister Nadiya had been sent home, which caused her to get even fatter.

Amazing Race competitor Natalie had to kiss her twin sister Nadiya goodbye, or maybe it was Nadiya kissing Natalie...In the end, nobody gave a shit. 

The competition was once again a one-on-one challenge, with the winner's tribe getting fishing gear.

John Rocker ended up playing against his stripper girlfriend, Julie, in a balance maze, in which they had to maneuver a ball on a platform over several obstacles and then roll their balls into various holes.

And as a stripper, Julie had not problem maneuvering over poles and jamming balls into holes, which sent her man John Rocker to Exile Island.

Explaining what it felt like to beat misogynistic dude Julie said, "I know I'm good at some things, but he's really good at a lot of things," before she sent a black dude, Jeremy, to Exile Island along with her racist man.

Wes blabbed about how John was really "John Rocker," or as shocked Dale gasped, "Was he the guy that got ran out of the friggin' league (for being racist)?"

That caused someone to blurt out, "It better be a big freakin' island."

John was visibly disgusted when Jeff Probst made it a point to note how he lost to his girlfriend. That caused John to bemoan, "drop the friend, I lost to a girl."

After winning the Reward Challenge and fishing gear, Reed, the resident gay guy for Coyopa, offered to trade Coyopa's beans for Hunahtu's flint since Coyopa had lost their flint and ability to make fire.

However, before Hunahtu could answer, an angry Jeff Probst jumped in and called Reed and Coyopa out, basically saying that if they didn't trade the fishing gear that they just won, he'd make sure the price for fire went up.

The Immunity Challenge turned out to be a sumo style battle where each tribe sent a member to square off one on one to try and knock their opponent off of a floating platform.

And while it was kind of unfair for Survivor to sent an admitted steroid user like John Rocker out to battle, Jon Mish literally beat the ever-loving shit out of him.

Better yet, even though her tribe won, John Rocker's girlfriend Julie looked at him like he was a giant pussy for losing to Jon Mish...but at least he was white. 

In a mother vs. daughter match between Misty and Baylor, Misty either had no motherly instinct, or put it aside.

"All I have to do is put a different face on her, and I'm going to kill her." Sure enough, both said that they were visualizing one of Misty's exes for the challenge, and for Baylor, it was the one who sexually molested her.

As it turned out, Misty split Baylor's lip right off the get go, who started crying and dropped her pad.

Baylor Wilson: This picture wasn't even from when she was on Survivor, it was from when she dated Brandon Hantz.

For the first time in her life Misty had her motherly instinct kick in and forgot about her ex(es), and basically refused to finish her daughter off even though she was hurting and dropped her pad.

That allowed Baylor to regain her composure and defeat her mother, who did not seem to put up much of a fight after her initial last to Baylor's face.

In a battle of the gay boyfriends between Reed and Josh, Drew from Hunahtu yelled out, "Go Josh," only to have Jon remind him, "It's Reed that is on our team."




Reed Kelly: To be fair to Drew, all gay people kind of look alike.

Reed wound up on top, which would seem to make him dominant one.

Then again, Reed Kelly used to date Clay Aiken.

With the result ending up tied, Kelley ended up redeeming herself in a rematch against beauty queen Jaclyn to win Immunity for Hunahtu.

Despite getting his ass whooped by a Yankee at the Immunity Challenge, John Rocker came back to camp and found the Immunity Idol for Coyopa after getting a clue for it while he was at Exile Island.

After Jeremy had John vow to protect his wife Vale, for some reason Val told John that she already had two Idols, one for her, and one for Jaclyn.

After blabbing about Val's claim, John Rocker tried his best to hold true to his word by telling Val that the rest of the tribe was going to split their votes between her and Baylor, and that she should probably play her Idol.

Of course, Val didn't really have an Idol, and while John Rocker technically kept his word to Jeremy, he knew that, and still acted like a douche.

That caused Val to say, "This is like an Oscar winning moment. I don't have an Idol, but it really doesn't matter," assuming that a vote split would mean that she'd be safe.

On the other hand, Josh was not happy when he saw John walk off to talk to Val alone, since it's not in John Rocker's character to talk to black people for no reason, and Josh questioned splitting the vote.

At Tribal Council, Val threw Baylor under the bus for playing both sides, saying she promised to vote with the girls but ended up siding with the guys.

I guess that was a bit of gamesmanship, because Val and Baylor ended up tied 4-4 in the initial vote, which lead to a re-vote.

Upon the re-vote, John Rocker switched his vote to Val since she didn't play her Idol like he told her to, which ultimately lead to Val getting voted out.

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